The Useful Tongue

Ephesians 4:29 – Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.

For the majority of the week, our focus has been on the first half of this verse as we seek to combat corrupting talk; however, today I want to call your attention to the way we can use our words for good.

Words can harm or heal. Words can bruise or build up.

Ephesians 4:29 doesn’t just call us to avoid harmful talk; it calls us to actively use our words as instruments of grace. Our words ought to give grace because we are people who have received grace. How are you using your words?

While many of us seek to control our tongue from profanity, insult, or filthiness, are we seeking to employ our tongue to encourage others?

This is Jordan’s words, not God’s, but I honestly think you should be the most encouraging, uplifting, kind speaker in your workplace and other spheres of influence. Are you?

I know you want to justify why this is not so, but is that right? Be honest!

As a follower of Jesus Christ—seeking to live in response to His love, hoping to model His love, known by His love—how YOU use YOUR WORDS matters a great deal! This does not mean that we avoid hard conversations or direct corrections, but it does mean that even in difficult talks we actively seek to be gracious in our speech.

Who do you need to build up today?
Who needs your encouragement?
What hard conversation do you need to approach with intentional grace?

Pray:
Psalm 19:14 — Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer.

The Divided Tongue

James 3:9–10
With [our tongue] we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in the likeness of God. From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so.

On Sunday, I used the example of someone stopping mid-sentence with, “I can’t say that in church.” Which begs the question: Should you say it outside of church? If so, how far away from the church do you need to be for it to be acceptable?

James’ point is hard to miss: How can you praise God and slander His people with the same mouth? How can you oscillate so easily between the highest form of speech and the lowest? James is not just confronting inconsistent speech; he is confronting a divided heart.

To make this practical, imagine if your speech were evaluated as closely as the media you consume. On the Internet Movie Database (IMDB), every show and movie includes a content section. Under the “Language” category, it lists how many profanity uses, insults, or derogatory remarks appear. Imagine receiving a similar breakdown for your words yesterday. Would you be proud of what appeared under the “Language” category of your life?

I do not want us to pass by this thought too quickly. What words do you regret saying? What comments were unnecessary or unhelpful? Would you be willing to turn your language content in to me?

I don’t want us simply to think negatively, though. What good use of language did you have? Were there moments of praise or prayer? Did you encourage or enlighten someone with your words?

I urge you now to think back over a few conversations from yesterday. What are you proud of? What needs to be confessed or corrected? What opportunities were missed?

Pray this verse:
Ephesians 5:4 – Let there be no filthiness nor foolish talk nor crude joking, which are out of place, but instead let there be thanksgiving.

The Untamable Tongue

James 3:6–8
6 And the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness. The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell. 7 For every kind of beast and bird, of reptile and sea creature, can be tamed and has been tamed by mankind, 8 but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.

Big Claim: No human can tame the tongue.

Fourteen years of marriage has taught me that Carlin and I respond to the seemingly impossible differently. Carlin acknowledges something is impossible and moves on. I want to prove the impossibility wrong. Telling me something is impossible is fuel to make me give my absolute best to overcome it.

James says it is impossible to tame the tongue. He even reminds us that we can tame the beasts of the field, the birds of the air, and creatures of the sea, but we cannot tame the tongue.

For some of you, that removes the responsibility of attempting to corral your tongue. If it is impossible, why even struggle with it? This is not the right response. James is not telling us it is impossible in order to excuse us from the endeavor.

James says no person can tame the tongue. As sons and daughters still prone to sin each day, we are not able to perfect our lives—much less our speech. Yet, as in our battle against sin, this does not excuse us to thoughtless living. Through the power of the Holy Spirit within us, we can make strides in our sanctification toward using our tongue in a godly manner.

That is why James has wisely encouraged us to be quick to listen and slow to speak (1:19).
That is why James calls us to be careful about what responsibility we take on (3:1).
That is why James has called us to pray for wisdom (1:5).

While perfection is unattainable, faithful effort empowered by the Holy Spirit is within our grasp.

Will you fight the good fight in the impossible task?
Will you attempt to control your tongue?

Pray:
Psalm 141:3 — Set a guard, O Lord, over my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips!

Words are windows to our heart!

Luke 6:45 – The good person out of the good treasure of his heart produces good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure produces evil, for out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks.

Big Idea: Words are a window to the heart.

In Luke 6, Jesus is teaching on the continuity that should be present within a person. A good tree should bear good fruit. One commentator made the profound statement, “We are not trees,” but his point is good. Good and godly people should produce good and godly things, but unlike trees, people lack perfect consistency; therefore, inconsistency is not proof of unbelief—but it is still revealing.

With continuity in mind, Jesus teaches that we should not be surprised by or ignore what comes out of our mouths, because the mouth is merely an outpouring of what is in our heart.

The mouth speaks what is in the heart.
So are you spewing slander? Check your heart!
Are you quick to judge? Check your heart!
Are you known to be arrogant or self-centered? Check your heart!

While you may not be able to spot any obvious or outward sins in your life, watch closely how you speak, for it may reveal hidden sinfulness that needs to be addressed.

Our words are a window to our heart. What does your speech reveal about the condition of your heart today?

Pray this:
Psalm 51:10 – Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me.

Words Matter

James 1:26
If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this person's religion is worthless.

Words matter.

While it is natural to compartmentalize our life, it is not biblical. Just as James taught that we cannot cherry-pick which laws to follow and which to ignore, we cannot speak without thought. James connects integrity of life to integrity of speech because both expose the heart.

BIG IDEA: Are you undoing your witness with your words?

Is your choice of words unfit for a follower of Jesus? Do you need to change the language you use each day? We must move from the question of “Can I say that?” to “Should I say that?” It is less about the freedom of word choice and more about the wisdom of how we use our words.

More than specific words, are you undoing your witness in the way you use your words? Are you quick to judge, susceptible to slander, greedy to know the gossip? Are you trustworthy with information? Are you constantly critical or quick to gripe?

Words matter.

James is clear in 1:26 that a failure to contain and control our words will refute our religion.

What step do you need to take today to combat the thoughtlessness with which you have handled your words?

Pray this:
God, help me be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger.