Paul’s Anxiety

2 Corinthians 2:12–13
12 When I came to Troas to preach the gospel of Christ, even though a door was opened for me in the Lord, 13 my spirit was not at rest because I did not find my brother Titus there. So I took leave of them and went on to Macedonia.

Anxiety has become common vernacular in our day, but what is it? Is it weakness? Worry? Fear?
Does it require panic attacks or medication? Are you born with it or do you develop it? Do a few have it, or do we all suffer?

I love how Paul describes his anxiety in verse 13: “my spirit was not at rest.” Over the last few years, I have come to understand—and be diagnosed with—an anxiety disorder. For most of my life, I would have said I simply worried a lot, feared certain things, or liked things in a certain way. I bet you can relate to that. You have certain conversations, situations, and/or experiences that cause you to shudder, sweat, and dwell.

So did the Apostle Paul. His spirit was not at rest—even with the great distraction of an open door for ministry. Even with work to be done, Paul could not take his mind off finding Titus and learning how the Corinthians responded to his letter.

Let me explain: Paul had a fragile relationship with the church in Corinth. He loved the people and was actually the founder of the church, but once he left, other voices of influence infiltrated the church and questioned his leadership. The church began drifting away from God’s way, so Paul wrote multiple letters and even made a painful visit. This moment in 2 Corinthians shows that he is anxiously awaiting a report from what theologians call “the Severe Letter.”

I write this today because some of you are struggling with anxiety—whether or not you know what to call it. You are living in a constant state of worry and fear over relational drift, workplace issues, parenting problems, or a rocky marriage. You are consumed by questions like: “What if?” “Did I do something?” “Are they upset?”

This doesn’t mean you are failing—it means you are human. We all struggle in seasons with anxious rumination that can become debilitating. Paul’s anxiety forced him to leave a ripe mission field. What is your anxiety costing you? We will talk more about that tomorrow.

Today, sit with these questions:

• What is causing me anxiety?

• Am I handling it well, or do I need to seek help?

• What is one step I can take today to combat anxiety?

Note: If you are struggling with this today, please reach out to me. Simply respond—it comes directly to me. I am here to help. I have walked this road through counseling and medication and want to help you experience the healing that is available.